RT @MotherNature69: I'm going to bury the High, Mild City

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A Peek Over Them Hills

I've always enjoyed the line in Jimmy Buffett's song "Incommunicado" that goes: On the day that John Wayne died/I found myself on the Continental Divide . . . Tell me where do I go from here/Guess I'll ride into Leadville and have a few beers. I have been hoping for many years now that a celebrity I respect dies on a day when I happen to be traversing America's rugged divider and that I could head in to Leadville and have a few beers in their honor. Alas, I've had no such luck.

Today was no exception . . . at least that I'm aware of. I guess I could've gone into Leadville and reflected on all that Brittany Murphy gave to us, but that probably wouldn't have taken longer than a shot of Jagermeister.

But Kim Peek is a completely different story. That's a fellow whom one could probably sit at a bar and reflect upon until one could no longer operate a motor vehicle. The dude knew every zip code in the country yet couldn't even dress himself. If you told him the date you were born, he could tell you what day of the week it was and possibly the last meal your mom ate before she delivered you into this wacky, spinning ball we call earth. They say there is no one like him in recorded history. That means Jesus didn't even have his skills. Think about that come Friday.

Anyway . . . supposedly there is a snow storm rolling it's way into Denver at this moment. I wouldn't know as I am 280 miles away. Where I am it is foggy and cold . . . like a good stein of beer. But from the looks of things, some inclement weather is indeed hitting the Mile High:

I'm not going to do a full throttle rundown of all the predictions, because they seem to be all over the place. Last I saw 9News was only committing to 1-3 inches by Wednesday afternoon and 4-8 total. Channel 4 was a little more optimistic with a 5-10 inch forecast by the time things are all said and done . . . which should be about the time Wapner comes on Thursday.

Travel safe you crazy bastards.

Love Always,
Flip

Backstreet's Back

Where are your fucking gloves, Libby? But yes, the ring is very nice.

My weather blogging is coming under fire from critics far and wide . . . and rightly so. Somehow I failed to notice that local meteorological icon Nick "The Occluded Front" Carter ended up moving over to Fox. This happened in June! If you recall, Captain Carter was unceremoniously dropped, like hot puke off a rest stop toilet (*plagiarizing Jeff Johnson*), from 9News back in January for monetary reasons. I thought then, and still do now, that Altieri had something to do with it. But I can't prove that . . . yet. Regardless, Carter is a seasoned veteran and and a good pick-up for Fox . . . at least according to the comments left on a story announcing his switch:

Nice to hear that Nick Carter is back – pilots are great weather forecasters. Nick’s sense of humor has been missed since Channel 9 made the big mistake of letting him go!

Comment by Jen J October 14, 2009 @ 3:19 pm

So glad to see more of Nick Carter on Fox31 weather. He’s one of the best Denver has ever had. Channel 9 made a big mistake letting him go. I hope he stays in Denver the rest of his career.

Comment by Evergreen Grandma October 8, 2009 @ 12:57 pm

In Scottsbluff, NE we get two Denver channels on our cable. I watch #2 because of Nick Carter. He is the best weatherman and I like his calmness in bad weather situations.

Comment by E J October 28, 2009 @ 5:47 am

Hey what happened between Nick Carter and the anchor on last nights broadcast, he didnt know that camera’s were back on and he told Nick Carter he didnt have a future??????

Comment by Ted S December 7, 2009 @ 9:05 am

I think it's clear that Nick is well regarded amongst the elderly, Nebraskans and pilots. And if you stop and think about it for a second, you'll realize that these are the folks most respected in the meteorological community. Why? Because pilots have to understand the weather so they don't kill themselves; Nebraskans who are up at 5:30AM probably farm and greatly depend on weather forecasts; and old people have been around long enough to know who's full of shit and who knows their weather. If I was Nick, I'd be pumped. I'll admit I have a soft spot in my otherwise cold, black heart for Nick. He seems earnest and steady, like the music of Ryan Bingham. And I think his fat man's hat is good shit.

But what about his forecast? Well, like everybody else, he said it's going to be as frosty as Tiger's marriage today. He also said to expect some heavier snow between 1 and 4 in the morning. I just had a look (1:30AM) and can confirm that is snowing, albeit lightly. It's also eight degrees, breezy and painful out there.

I would be remiss if I didn't take a moment and give a Mile High Salute to the Barrel Man (aka Tim McKernan), who sadly passed on to the great unknown Saturday. He was the president de facto of Broncos Country and will be sorely missed. He was awesome in so many ways . . . this being one of them:

And if you're going to the Broncos game on Sunday the 20th, see if you can't get yourself a barrel to wear in tribute.

Roll out the barrels . . . we'll have a barrel of fun,
Flip

Scary Cold

Kath feigns amazement in her snow attracting outfit

Wow . . . my video capture equipment is down so this is all I can share from tonight's forecast by the Matron Saint. It was bizarre to say the least. Not so much the actual forecast - she's pretty robotic when it comes to reading teleprompters and pointing at maps - it was the playful banter with the anchors that was creepy. The photo above was taken right after she said, "Hey, it's still fall." Then she held that odd grin for a few seconds while Adele Arakawa made mention of looking forward to the 20s. Then Kath started giggling and saying something about how weird it was that Adele would say that before blurting out, "Fall in Colorado!"

I'm not doing a good job of describing the interaction, but believe me, it was strange. It reminded me of a party I attended a few weeks ago. This gal was virtually passed out in the host's bed due to, apparently, too many shots. All of the sudden, she sprung to life and ran into the living room where she performed an incredibly detailed (and sexy) dance routine involving a chair and the late Michael Jackson's music. To the complete shock of everyone in the room, she absolutely nailed it. When the song ended, she bowed and then staggered back into the bedroom and passed out (and yes, I left her alone . . . get your minds out of the gutter). That's essentially what this forecast was like.

Anyway, Sabine said there's going to be a dusting to an inch of snow in the early morning hours which should make for another awesome commute. I can't wait. Also, the temperature should top out in the mid teens. Be thankful you're not homeless.

Snow Forecast Round-Up

9News: According to 9NEWS Meteorologist Ashton "Pees Sitting Down" Altieri, snow will develop along the Front Range late Thursday evening and could continue at times through the Friday morning commute. The Denver, Boulder and Aurora areas should see less than 1 inch of accumulation. Locationas farther to the north including Fort Collins, Loveland and Greeley will likely see a total of 2 to 5 inches of accumulation.

7News: More snow is likely to fall in the mountains, adding another possible 4-10 inches. A chance for a brief period of snow in the Denver Metro area will bring 1-2 inches of accumulation and 2-5 inches of snow is expected for the foothills north of Denver. The heaviest snow still looks to be over northeastern Colorado. Projected snow fall totals for the northeast corner of the state include 4-10 inches.

Fox31: Sunshine today . . . but clouds increase tonight as our next winter storm moves into the state. This storm will bring moderate to heavy snow to the mountains through Friday where another 4-8" will fall in areas north of I-70. Snow will eventually spread east onto the plains late tonight into Friday morning. The heaviest snowfall should be over the Northeastern plains (NE Weld, Morgan, Washington, Yuma, Logan Sedgwick & Phillips Counties) where 4-7" are possible, with a few locations getting into the 6-10" range in extreme NE Colorado and Nebraska. Expect a range of 1-3" well north of Denver into Fort Collins and Greeley. The snow potential for the rest of the Front Range & Denver area is much lower, with amounts up to 1" by midday Friday. - Chris "The Pasty Meteorologist" Dunn

News4: Northeastern Colorado is under a Winter Storm Warning from tonight until Friday afternoon. Cities like Ft. Morgan, Sterling, Yuma, Holyoke and Julesburg could see between 6-10 inches of snow. The closer you are to the line of Interstate 70 the less snow you will have. Cities like Limon can expect around 2-5 inches. In Denver, we will have up to 2 inches, but it will last into Fridday morning during the commute. Farther north toward Ft. Collins, expect 2-4 inches of snow. The foothills will get about 3-5 inches between 6,000 and 9,000 feet. - Stacey "Boom Boom" Donaldson

Wunderground.com: Chance of snow showers late in the eveing . . . then snow showers likely after midnight. Snow accumulation up to 1 inch. Lows in the lower 20s. Southeast winds 10 to 20 mph becoming northeast winds 10 to 15 mph around midnight. Chance of snow 60 percent.

Accuweather.com: Thursday night - Mostly cloudy and breezy with a bit of snow, accumulating a coating to an inch . . . Friday morning - A bit of snow in the morning, up to 1"; otherwise, mostly cloudy and breezy.

Weather.com: Thursday night - Variable clouds with snow showers. Low 24F. S winds shifting to WNW at 10 to 15 mph. Chance of snow 70 percent. About one inch of snow expected . . . Friday morning - Scattered snow showers during the morning. Then partly to mostly cloudy for the afternoon. High 33F. Winds NNE at 10 to 15 mph. Chance of snow 30 percent.

All official and unofficial FKS weather spotters should be on the third highest alert level and can report their findings at their convenience.

Inching Along

Hi. How's it going? Good. Great to hear. Hey, listen, if you have to commute this morning, be aware that Coniglio predicted some snow. So did the rest of them. I know, I know . . . but let's just see how this plays out.

I watched an egregious amount of NFL playoff action this weekend and, in accordance to my rules, drank an egregious amount beer. But now I feel really terrible. Every time I pass gas it smells like stale Red Bull and Vodka. I didn't have any Red Bull or Vodka over the weekend which leaves me confused and concerned.

Have an awesome week.

Love,
Flip

Snow Forecast Round Up

What's up, Natives, Texans (gross) and Californians? The lack of posting has been quite uncouth, I know, but shit's been happening and it's hampering old Flip's schedule. Said shit isn't horribly interesting, but the crux of it is I picked up a debilitating chest cold (probably from that vagabond) that put me out of commission for a few days (I coughed so hard and intensely the morning before New Year's Eve that I sharted in bed). Luckily I rallied and even foolishly smoked a cigarette as aught nine was rung in (under extremely mild temperatures might I add). Good stuff . . . although I'm pretty bummed that this will be the last of the "aughts" for my lifetime. At least we can still say "back in aught one, two, four, etc." ad nauseum for the foreseeable future. Like, "Remember when Kathy Sabine completely blew forecasting the great Holiday Blizzard of aught six? It's amazing she still has a job!"

Anyway, the prognosicators of atmospheric conditions are back at it and are predicting a few inches of snow. Here's a quick round up of the various local forecasts for your pleasure:

9News (Altieri) - "The cold front responsible for the snow will move over Denver and the Front Range around midday on Saturday. Once the front passes, temperatures will drop rapidly and snow will start to develop. Most of the snow in the metro area will fall during the late afternoon or early evening on Saturday. The 9NEWS Weather Team expects 1 to 3 inches of total accumulation for most metro neighborhoods. Locations along the Palmer Divide in Douglas and Elbert Counties could see up to 5 inches while the foothills see up to 6 inches. Northern Colorado including Fort Collins, Loveland, and Greeley will see 1 inch or less."

Channel 4 (Gaguilera) - "A cold front arrives early Saturday morning and will drop our temperatures back in the 30's. There is also a chance for light snow showers around the metro area but it's not expected to bring any accumulation. Sunday's high will only be in the 20's."

**Ed. Note - Nice! Right off the bat we know one of the big dogs are going to be dead wrong. My money's on 9 News. Altieri inspires no confidence.**

7News (Hidalgo) - "Another cold front will move into the state on Saturday morning, spreading snow into the mountains and colder temperatures across the plains. Afternoon highs in the metro area will be about 25 to 30 degrees colder than Friday. There will also be a slight chance of light snow across the plains and in the metro area with the passing of this storm on Saturday afternoon."

Fox31 (Tomer) - Eat a fat one, Fox, for making us watch your stupid video forecasts. Tomer, who I bet is very awkward around women, thinks the cold front's going to blow in during the overnight/early morning hours and with the snow following in the afternoon/evening. He says 0-3 inches which is a no-no here at FKS. If you want to be a money forecaster when it comes to snowfall, you need to be accurate within two inches. Three is too wide of a margin. Especially when you're throwing zero in there. What the hell? Grow a pair, Tomer! Either stick to your guns and say it's going to snow 1-3 inches or go with a trace to no accumulation. It can't be both you geeky bastard.

KWGN 2 (Who Knows) - You people are lazier than Fox. There is virtually no words on their page. Just pictures and video. Shameful. Anyway, here's their guess:



I'll be back Sunday to check up on these goons. Until then, you can find me at either a sports bar enjoying NFL playoff football or at the Grizzly Rose enjoying the melodious tunes of The Randy Rogers Band and Cross Canadian Ragweed.

Lastly, I would be remiss if I didn't send off one final Mile High Salute to Mein Shanny. While things have indeed been mediocre in terms of wins this past decade, the man did deliver two world championships to this title-starved city and I will never, ever forget that. That overly tan, rodent-looking football genius brought much joy and pride to this city and for that we should all be thankful. Actually, you don't have to be. But I always will be. Happy trails, Mike.


(Nobody chews zebra better than Shanny)

Crystal Egger's Cold Front Brings All the Boys to the Yard

Whelp, 11AM has come and gone and there's still no sign of any moisture - at least not downtown. But the skies are looking ominous and/or angry. I, for one, welcome their bitterness and hope they unleash a fine squall for our evening entertainment. All of the local stations are currently predicting between 2-5 inches of frozen crystals to fall from the sky here in the Denver Metro area. Weather.com is going with a conservative 1-3 inches while accuweather.com is predicting between 3-6. Almost everyone is in agreement that the southern and western sections of town may see anywhere between 5-10 inches of snow by Tuesday morning. It's all very exciting. So is the poor man's Erin Andrews of Denver weather forecasting, Crystal Egger. If you are not familiar with her, may I suggest you make your introduction here. Also, this is an official call to all FKS weather spotters to be on alert and ready to make snowfall measurements tomorrow morning or late tonight (and photograph/video these measurements), preferably using something unconventional. This is also a call to all high school kids to find an empty parking lot to spin donuts in once enough snow has fallen. That is all.

Hits & Misses - Part 2

At left is Kathy (I think - it might be Audra from Rocky's Autos) at the height of her powers slumming with what appears to be Bob Kendrick and Kirk Montgomery. I was watching a 9News segment Friday or Saturday night and they were previewing the "Lighting the Lights" ceremony at the City and County Building. Some woman anchor was giving Kirk shit about his voice being hoarse (he was due to sing at the event minutes later) and his hair looking bad. Kirk seemed positively rattled by these digs and looked genuinely afraid. It was probably the most hilarious thing I've seen on 9News in the past five years.

I also found this comment from 9News.com, made in reference to the top story about the cold and potential snow, to be amusing and/or spot on:

gobadgerzzz wrote:

Please, 9 News, I am begging and pleading with you. Don't make a "trace-2 inch" prediction of snow the lead story, like it was last night on your 5:00 news. You just set yourself up to look clueless. Don't you realize that when you make snow the LEAD STORY (no matter how little your prediction is), it is all anyone can talk about around town? It's all I hear about at work, at the grocery store, at the bank. People talking about snow coming cause you hyped it up as THE LEAD STORY both on the news and your website! Viewers don't even wait to hear how much is predicted, they just hear SNOW and run with it. Everyone expects a lot of snow, then you wake up, and nothing. You look like fools when you do this! Even my husband got called into DIA for SNOW REMOVAL last night. Had to go in at 2:00 a.m.!! Guess what? No snow!! How many other businesses did the same because of your hyped up story? Please! Common sense. For small amounts of snow like this, it can wait for the regular weather segment. It is, after all, the mountains we live in.

Anyway, it's the evening rush hour and, from what I see out my window, there is nary a flake flying. This means the second part of Kathy's prediction last night ends in FAILURE. There will be no snow affecting the evening drive. Good. I don't want her to start getting too accurate all of the sudden. But her forecast, as well as everyone else's, is being quickly revised to include a minimal shot of snow tomorrow. A breakdown:

Weather.com - Low of 22 tonight, High of 28 tomorrow, 1-4 inches of snow by Thursday night
Accuweather.com - Low of 16 tonight, High of 25 tomorrow, 1-4 inches of snow by Thursday night
9News - Low of 14 tonight, High of 24 tomorrow, 2-4 inches of snow by Thursday night
7News - Low of 12 tonight, High of 21 tomorrow, 1-3 inches of snow by Thursday night
News4 - Low of 19 tonight, High of 27 tomorrow, 1-3 inches of snow by Thursday night
Fox31 - Low of I don't know - he didn't say, High of 25 tomorrow, 2-4 inches of snow by Thursday night
Channel 2 - Low of 15 tonight, High of 24 tomorrow, 2 1/2 to 4 1/2 inches of snow by Thursday night

Hits & Misses - Part 1

After almost a week of no Sabine, I made it a point last night to watch Mrs. Red Umbrella in action and can report the following: She was spot on with regard to what time the winds would kick up as the polar air mass moved through the Denver metro area. At 11:00PM Tuesday night, high winds ushered in noticeably frigid air and low, wispy, fast-moving clouds. I smoked a cigarette as I watched it all go down and nodded my head in an approving manner, for I was duly impressed with the Sabinenomics unfolding before me. But Kathleen also said, and I paraphrase, "There will be snow on your way into work and on your way home." She was definite about this snow and at first I thought, "Wow, good work giving yourself such a large window." People generally go to work anytime between 6:00 and 10:00AM and come home between 3:00PM and 7:00PM. Any hint of snow during those periods and Kathy could kick back with a relaxing glass of Pinot and revel in the self satisfaction of being correct on her snow forecast. Well, get the corkscrew out because, according to my sources, one sixteenth of an inch of snow fell at some point this morning. Well done, Kath! You fucking nailed it! I will monitor the afternoon precipitation from my personal weather center high above the streets in the heart of the city and report back on the accuracy of Mrs. Sabine's second drive-time forecast. Until then . . . I bid you goodbye and hope your Wednesday kicks ass. Stay warm, won't you?

Cold Fronts for the People!

<--- You see that? Yeah. You like that, don't you? Gets you all hot, doesn't it? I'm talking to you, snowboarders and skiers and sledders and people who enjoy snowball fights. Time to wax up your gear (sexual euphemism not exactly intended, but enjoyed nonetheless) and jam I-70 because the flakes are flying. I am unsure of what was forecast for the mountains last night (or even Denver) as I was too consumed by the election the past several days to care about crappy weather forecasts by lily white meteorologists. I did hear this morning that 6-12 inches may fall in the high country, with 18 big ones up near Rabbit Ears Pass (named after either Steve Javy or Rabbit Ears peak). By the looks of the photo here, I'd say they've received three (3) inches at the tunnel thus far (3:30PM - Nov. 5th). I am very good at eyeballing snow totals by remote camera. It is a trait passed on to me by my grandpa on my mom's side, even though I never knew him. And you'll have to help me out, because snow may or may not have been forecast for Denver last (Nov. 4th) evening. I don't think it happened. I can report that rain fell at a nice pace for about seven (7) minutes starting around 1:36AM. I know this because I was drunk on whiskey and Budweiser and the sudden splatter of raindrops on my windows confused me and forced me outside to investigate. I gave a thumbs up skyward and went to bed.

FUN KATHY SABINE FACT FROM HER BIO ON 9News.com: I began college studying to be a veterinarian. I started work on my first degree in Animal Science at Cal Poly later switching to a major in journalism. My work on my second degree in meteorology began years later at Metropolitan State College in Denver and also at Mississippi State University.

Now, I can't quite decipher if she got one or two meteorology degrees (or if that's even possible/useful). Either she got one from Metro and one from Mississippi State, or she somehow combined studies at those two universities to get one super meteorology degree that she puts to use five days a week. Either way, I would venture to bet that she is one of the few people in the world to study weather at those two schools. Also, good to hear about her veterinarian background. I encourage any of you with sick pets to email her for advice.