Sunday, March 22, 2009

Smoke The Dust Bowl

Earlier I had expressed extreme optimism, bonerism and excitement with regard to a low pressure front's predicted path. It was supposed to tease the Colorado/New Mexico border which likely would've meant upslope winds and a good chance of heavy moisture here in the Mile High. Turns out the fucking thing is too far north meaning little in the way of much needed precip in these parts and a blizzard for those poor saps in Wyoming and further up the Northern Great Plains, where they definitely don't need it. Eat shit, Mother Nature. You are a cruel, unforgiving wench with lopsided tits and a terrible attitude. That's right. I said it. What are you going to do about it? Tie us up and screw us with a drilldo? You don't have the guts.

Anyway, I'm still holding out hope that something squirrely will happen, but Negative Nancy and Coniglio are not exactly giving me much reason to believe. Hopefully their collective prediction is as accurate as my bracket predicitons.

Also, it was 79 degrees here today, tying a record (/makes wanking motion). This seems like the 11th record high we've tied or broken in the last couple of months and it's getting kind of old. I know a lot of people back east would want to punch me in the face for complaining about an extremely warm winter/early spring, and I respect and welcome that, but enough is enough. Make with the moisture.

I love you,

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