Smarch Madness

Finally. We've waited damn near all winter for Mother Nature to lay down upon us and it looks as though she's finally ready to make it happen . . . starting in the next couple of hours. Women. Always making you wait just a little bit longer.

But look how excited Gaguilera is. He hasn't been doing shit for the past three months and now it's go time. He's downright giddy to tussle with this storm. God bless him. I feel the same enthusiasm. Of course, I have the day off of work tomorrow and will be spending in sitting in a bar for 12 hours drinking, eating fried foods and watching nonstop basketball (and heavy snow). I was excited to begin with. This common Wing storm (winter/spring - also known as a Chicken Wing storm around these parts) is just icing on the cake.

You know what I bet Dave's been doing during all this down time? Working on his moves:


In the spirit of fair disclosure, that video was shot back in March of Aught Seven. It looks like he's shaking a watermelon while drunk. I don't know if Amelia is still in the picture (ladies). I also can not confirm if Dave is related to Christina, but one can only hope.

But I'm getting off track. We got ourselves a gold ole fashioned winter storm warnin'. That's what's important. I've already sent out White Hot Alerts in telegram form to all veteran FKS weather/genital measurement specialists in the area, so let's hope we get some good photographic evidence of this late winter event. I don't know what more I can say, really. It's going to be awesome. If you'll recall, a similar thing happened a week short of a year ago. That storm lead to a pretty epic night for Flip in Historic Lower Downtown Denver. It also lead to a very epic snow measurement photo sent in by Ronnie Cheetahtoes:

So enjoy it, kind citizens of Denver. Use it as an excuse to not go to work and come by old Flip a few cold ones down at the bar. At the very least, use it as an excuse to leave early. You had a rough week . . . probably because of St. Patrick.

NEW FEATURE - LATE WINTER STORM RECIPES

I was talking with a friend to the blog and she was mentioning that one of her favorite things to do during big snow storms is to cook. It got me to thinking about the Crockpot and all the good shit you can cook in it. So I'll feature one of my Crockpot favorites today and will take reader submissions in the future.

Trailer Park Dip
1 to 1.75lbs. of lean, ground beef
1 to 2 lbs. of Velveeta(TM) processed "cheese"
1 to 2 cans of Rotel(TM) Diced Tomatoes & Green Chilies (I prefer one Original and one Hot)

Cube up the Velveeta(TM) and toss it in the crock pot on low. Or high. It doesn't matter. While that takes the form of melted goodness, cook the beef over medium heat. Spice it up before you do. Whatever kind of good stuff you enjoy. I usually go with cayenne, cumin, onion powder a blast of paprika and some Santa Maria(TM). Drain the meat (ha!). Assuming the cheese has melted or is almost melted, splash some milk in there, give it a stir and then throw everything else (Rotel and beef) in. Give it one more stir. Grab yourself some tortilla chips and dig in. Or don't . . . it will be fine marinating in there. You've got all the time in the world. It's snowing really hard outside and you have nowhere to go.

Alright . . . good luck tomorrow. You'll need it . . . for your bracket and your commute. Here are some predictions:

Sabine 6"-12"

Weather.com 5"-7"

Egger (= boner) 4"-12" (Seriously, Crystal? Terrible)

Corey Christiansen (7News) 6"-12"

Gaguilera (News4) 6"-12"

Weather.gov 5"-12"