The Flip Man Cometh

I'll be back in the old stomping grounds over the weekend. I hear the weather is going to be nice - so I'll make sure to bring a heavy jacket and snow boots. Every year myself and great friends of FKS gather at a bar during the first Friday of the NCAA basketball tournament to drink and laugh and eat and smoke cigarettes and harass Kansas fans and drink some more. Here's what happened last year. Names have been censored FBI-style to protect the innocent. See you Friday.

Your Area and the Weather - Don't Get Touched Inappropriately

Your area is going to be violated! Quick, fashion a loin cloth made of plastic wrap and cower meekly in the nearest bathroom stall . . . for WINTER WEATHER is going to wreck your shitty junk. Your area must be protected at all costs. Invest in shields and guns and snow shovels and lice creams and dental dams at once! Actually, just a Nutty Buddy will do.

Anyway, looks like some fun times are afoot for the Mild, High City. Quite a week out there. First you have Tebow getting Tebowned by Timself for 95 percent of the game before Tebowing it around and pulling a Tebow. By the way, we're not talking about him with a hint of adoration without that onside kick. Fucking ridiculous. Then you have the reemergence of the mysterious, delicious McRib.

And now the prospect of a massive dump by Old Man Winter? Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttttttt . . . you guys are living right.

I'll be back later on with some further analysis of the snowfall predictions . . . mainly those of this blog's namesake and her minions. Right now, they're saying 6-12 inches. You want it, don't you Denver? Yeah. You want it bad.

Talk to you later. I've missed you guys.

-Flipper T.

PS - I need all FKS Weather Spotters to get stoned and then be on hazy alert. I want odd photos and blurry memories of the storm please. Thank you.

SNOW-MG, LOL!

Look what I found on my Facebook this morning . . . the infamous St. Louis-ophile Ditchfield-Murray - sporting a fancy new name and dispensing ominous news. Very exciting stuff. Normally my Facebook is full of people posting cryptic messages (looking for attention) or quotes with no attributes (really gets my goat). And then there's updates on children (no one cares) and bragging about how great life is (most likely a lie). So it's refreshing to see a local "celebrity" (and I use this term in the loosest way possible) gracing my little sphere doing what she kind of does in very mediocre fashion once in awhile. The only other celebrity on my docket is Jason Mulgrew. His blog (Everything is Wrong With Me) has seen better days, but if you're snowed/frozen in for the next couple of days, I can't recommend enough a thorough poking of the archives. Drink beer while you do so.

Tebow balls . . . I'm rambling. Who gives a shit about the Facebook when we're finally set to add to our impressive one inch snow total for the season (and when I say season, I mean September, 2010 through May, 2011). Virtually everyone's on the same page with this one. Five to ten inches by tomorrow morning and scrotum-clenching cold. Personally, I think it's too cold and we won't get anywhere close to 10 inches of snow. I like Carter's forecast of 5 inches in the city. I'm saying four inches, tops. I'll let Gaguilera break it down one time:


Here's a look at what's going on in Lower Downtown Denver thus far. Be warned . . . it is not at all impressive.



Lastly, I wanted to put all FKS Weather Watchers(TM) on HOT WHITE alert. You know what that means. Speaking of FKS Weather Watchers(TM), I rather enjoyed this text I got from Billy Axelrod on Dec. 26 at 8:01PM MST: Egger's on the weather channel right fucking now. Creamed jeans.

Tebow bless you, Billy.